Apopka, Florida Apopka Youth Council, 2 Mar 2023

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From YouTube: Apopka Youth Council Teen Mental Wellness Townhall

Description

This Apopka Youth Council (AYC) Teen Mental Wellness Townhall is for teens. This event will be live streamed from Apopka City Hall Council Chambers on March 2, 2023 at 6 PM. Teens can submit questions at www.Apopka.gov/AYC until 12 PM on March 2, 2023.

Experts will be answering questions submitted by local teens. There will be discussion about issues that teens are dealing with. This event coincides with World Teen Mental Wellness Day.

#ApopkaYouthCouncilTownhall #ApopkaYouthCouncil #CityofApopkaFL #WorldTeenMentalWellnessDay #YouthCouncil #Florida #CentralFL #TeenMentalWellness #MentalWellness

A

A

Good evening.

B

I'm Dr Jackson, Dr, shakini, Harris Jackson, with the city of Apopka I, am the overseer of the Apopka youth, Council and also the granite administrator here for this city. Thank you all for coming today we are live streaming, this um town hall tonight, so you all will be able to go back and and View, and hopefully we also have an audience online right now.

B

I would like to at this time introduce our panel. We have Courtney Crawford, Dede, Eshelman, Pastor, Joelle, poke and Dr Janice modest with us today. Thank you all for being here. We also have our aoic member Miss Olivia young, who will be helping to moderate our conversation tonight. So thank you so much.

B

um We started this whole idea of the mental health town hall because we submitted a video to the Florida League of cities back in 2021 and they posed the question. What is the most critical issue? That's affecting youth today, and there was an overwhelming response with um the kids coming back and saying that mental health was the main thing that was affecting them, so we hired a videographer and um actually created this video. That I would like to share with you all before that.

B

I want to give a special shout out to Annie joy and Juniper.

A

Hope for being here with us today to therapy dogs.

B

And we're going to play the video that started the whole conversation.

C

Everybody should be able to share their mental health stories with open-mindedness and understanding, but sadly we live in a society that doesn't allow that to happen.

C

um When I was 12 years, old I was diagnosed with a mild form of Tourette's and most people don't notice my touch because I've dealt with it for a long time. So I know how to suppress it. Whenever I look at my own personal story, I bring it up to some people and they're quite ignorant to the idea, and it makes me want to bring it up less and less going to new places and meeting it's always more, exhausting than it should be.

C

I think it's just because the stress and anxiousness that come before it- or maybe it's like the regret itself doubt that comes after me, I, usually think so much about what I'm going to say around social situation that it comes.

D

Out either awkward awkward humor but I want.

C

To be like, I want to look after this I hate that I overthink every situation after her and during it, and that causes much to stress out more.

D

E

D

E

Lot of pressure and responsibilities that you have as it is.

D

F

Then, to add on being an.

E

E

For that um it can put on even more stress if you're waking up early in the morning, you have more school practice or even late night practice like when you want to sleep, but you have to finish your home or study for a test. It goes for everything in life. Your parents expect you to have your grade, especially for student athletes like that's, not easy.

C

Practices all different hours and then trying to make the best grades that you're capable of and the two schedules conflict a lot and sleep is like a main factor.

C

I feel like a lot of people, don't talk about this because it's something very personal I don't like talking about it, because I don't like people thinking that I depend on them. Unfortunately, sometimes I just feel like really sad it like stops me from things like the the smallest things. I can do at something like school work, sometimes I feel like I'm. Not my trauma isn't as important as someone else's, so they do have like a nice family.

C

I don't know I feel like that. Also, like stops a lot of people from playing speaking up about it.

D

What is something we could do or peers can do to find a solution.

C

Any mindfulness practice is key to getting out of your head, because the whole topic that we're talking about is mental health. So if you can become more aware of what is going on in your mind, that will really help you to overcome any sorts of.

E

Negative thoughts, definitely starting within the family, will help I think that will cause the most because um you're around your parents a lot so your parents.

D

Are going to be talking about mental health, you or you've been talking about their own mental health. That will help a lot. I feel like telling people that it's okay to have therapy and not have it looked down upon because it's useful and it helps people. So what do you think that our local government can do as well as being a pufficient community to help us.

C

Local government in general can create more affordable therapy so that people are more open to the idea of getting help the thing about the mental health phaser like a great start. But if you want to have more of a impact, then you need to incorporate it into the way that workers goals, foreign.

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A

H

Right technical difficulty before you started again: I can start it again before you start it. Oh I see that way. I can talk to them before we start the music, so hello, everyone, I'm, Dr, Janice, it's nice to meet every one of you, so I'm a behavior coach, so I'm gonna use you guys.

H

As um an example, I know in the video I saw that someone said about mindfulness, and so sometimes we think it's a big word or mindfulness means um you know like it's complex, like it literally means like meditation or what does it mean so mindfulness just means being aware of where you are um and how you are feeling at the moment and just taking in consideration the space that you're in so with that in mind.

H

A first short activity before we begin is I want you to be mindful of where you are right now, but then also mindful of how you're feeling so some of you, your parents, took you came home, pick you up and you're rushing and you might be feeling a little bit anxious or worried or sad. So um I want you to look at those faces and just think about how you may be feeling at this moment so to be self-aware.

H

Think about how you're feeling and with that in mind, we're going to get centered, which just means we're going to focus in on the now and we're just going to focus in on our breathing before we jump into the next segment. So let's try this mindfulness activity and then you're gonna, hopefully notice a change from you know. You just came from school or practice and just be comfortable where we are right now, so uh we're gonna all set up and we're going to put one hand in our stomach and one on our chest.

H

And so you, you put you put in your hands both places and stand up for a minute this right under your rib cage, and you want to feel your stomach um breathing in you want to feel it and then, when you exhale through your mouth, you want to feel your chest going down. So you want to inhale and feel your stomach going in. You want to Exhale feel your chest breathing out all right. So we're just gonna focus in on our breathing.

H

The music is a little bit loud supposed to be soft, maybe softer right now, so we're going to click the screen. When you see the um it's gonna, the breathing is gonna help you I will do guided um it's a guided, mindfulness I will just guide you through it to breathe in and breathe out. So the affirmation we're going to use is I am loved. That's the affirmation, so we're going to be breathing out, stress and breathing in love. Okay, all right! Let's try! This I see you.

F

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H

Great team, all right so once the music starts.

H

Or you can just click on the.

H

Bag is ready. Okay,.

H

So we're just focusing in on our breath. So when it goes in I'm gonna tell you to breathe in gonna Breathe In, Love, you're, gonna, exhale um stress all right. So let's go so breathe in breathe out.

H

And through your nose out through your mouth in through your nose deeply out through your mouth, breathe in and breathe out, and do it deeply so you can feel your stomach going in and your chest going out, breathe in exhale, stress and you're breathing in just love, just exhale and breathe in do three more times.

H

Exhale all right inhale push it all out.

H

And breathe in push it all out and the last one we're gonna do a big breath in out.

H

You did it. That was your mindfulness activity. Hopefully you felt the shift and you're ready to to learn and to be in the moments.

B

So, thank you so much Dr Janice. Does everyone feel a little less stressed? I do I do at this time. We are going to turn it over to Pastor Joel poke, we're gonna, have just a prayer and then we'll start with um Crawford. Okay,.

I

Father we thank you for this Gathering and this assembly. We thank you for this space and time. We thank you for those that are here and those that have joined us online father help us to listen and learn effectively to take in the wisdom that is given, so that it become guidance for our lives. We give you glory, honor and praise and we say, amen, amen,.

J

Amen go ahead and pass it.

F

So on the video someone said that well, actually, a lot of people said that they were anxious, stressed out depressed and had a lot of things that bothered them, and so you might be wondering what anxiety is or what is depression, and why is it a problem? For me, anxiety is really fear.

F

It can be fear of many different things. Some people are afraid of social interaction or social settings. They might be naturally shy or introverted and become very stressed out when having to interact with other people. People their age often are more, can be worse than adults, but there's also fear of failure. Fear of certain you know types of animals or certain numbers there. Those are a little bit less common, but just being afraid, can cause you to do things or not do things that you want to be able to do so.

F

If you want to know if you're anxious, you can ask yourself, um do I avoid situations that might be fearful for me. Do I avoid school. Do I avoid going to out with my friends. Sometimes you can be irritable, you can be fidgety um fidgety in a way like you can't really stop moving your leg or you just um you.

F

Just can't really sit still and uh being unable to sleep, because your thoughts kind of Chase themselves around in your head thoughts of of things that that make you scared the future any any kind of thing.

F

So that kind of describes, anxiety, depression. um People might wonder, are they depressed and again the word? Depression gets used a lot, um but sometimes I. Think people don't really know what they're actually what it describes.

F

um You can be sad, but if you're sad are you depressed, um depression is a little more intense than sadness can have sadness as part of it, but a lot of times it lasts longer. You can be sad because you know your pet maybe passed away, so you would be sad for a little bit, but you would also be able to overcome it and get back to your usual life um depression. Sometimes it's hard to overcome. You might be depressed for a couple of weeks.

F

You might be sleeping all the time unable to motivate yourself to get out of bed and not just because you're, tired and doing a lot, but just because you don't see the point, you might have negative thoughts in your mind. um Like um you know, what's the point: it's not worth it. uh You know things that just make you want to continue sleeping and not go, and you might not even really want to do things that you normally enjoy.

F

So if that goes on for a week a couple of weeks, you might want to consider um talking to someone getting help because it can get worse.

K

Here we have a question that was submitted online, so someone asked do we feel anxious because it is helping us or hurting us.

J

I am I think that's an excellent question. My name is Dede I'm, a marriage and family counselor. We feel anxious, sometimes um because it is actually helping us when we think of performance anxious. You know performance anxiety.

J

um A little bit of anxiety uh usually helps us Focus because of the chemicals that are produced in our brain. When anxiety gets triggered in our brains, we're usually able to focus more clearly, okay, but when it goes on, then anxiety can be hurtful to us. Okay, because when we stay in that high state of alert for long periods of time, it does cause problems for our health causes heart problems, most of the chronic illnesses in our country.

J

um They talk about those breathing techniques that Dr Janice, just LED you in the when you have heart disease and other chronic illnesses.

J

um Just those mindfulness activities help decrease the stress-related illnesses, and so that's where anxiety or stress can hurt us now. Stress, of course, can be good stress and it can be negative stress.

J

A good stress are things like you know: I've I've got a new baby on the way and I'm excited about it or I'm. Getting married and I'm excited about that or I just got accepted to the college that you know my first choice college that I applied to those are things that people consider to be positive in their lives but they're, also stressful.

J

So a cumulative stress and cumulative anxiety is what is can be harmful. Good question. Thank.

K

You do the clicker, you have another question for the panel. What should I do if I feel sad upset or anxious.

K

H

Do on it? Oh, yes, I I actually have some of them on the slide later on, but um one of the things one of the other mindfulness activities I can share with you is affirmation, so affirmation is just saying something positive. Instead of, if you normally say you know, I hate, math or I can't believe I have to go to school.

H

Today, um affirmation will be finding a positive thing to say so, for example, if you think you don't hit me, if you think you don't like math I'm using that because I really don't, um if you don't like math, you can, you can say something positive like I am smart or I can handle this or I am successful. So you can just find one for the day and just have it locked and loaded.

H

If you know you're gonna need it throughout the day for different things, it can be a a scripture like I am fearfully wonderfully made. It can be something as simple as we did earlier, like I am loved um if you feel like you're, going into a situation where um you're being bullied or people aren't treating you nicely, you can remind yourself that I am loved and so that's a great way to deal with uh being anxious because you get to um before you even get into sadness.

H

So sometimes you can catch it when I like to say in the yellow when you're anxious, because we know red is like out of control those color wheels um so just having things ready like breathing right before a test to kind of clear your brain and um use an affirmation. So I'll leave you with that one. For now we have more later, but you can try affirmations and it worked for you today, so it might work for you tomorrow.

K

Thank you. Those are some great tips. I hear that a lot around school, I hate math, so.

G

I think a lot of students can use.

K

K

Okay, another question: how do I get out of being in a bad mental state.

J

That's that's a really good question, I! Think um one of the things that I think of when um you know I'm in this place that I can't seem to shake or when a student is in a place where they can't seem to shake it. um I usually try to identify First using mindfulness, identify First. How intense is that mental state, you know Dr Modesto is talking a little bit.

J

How intense is the sadness or the depression if it's going into that or the anxiety um if it's high I usually use a scale of 0 to 10., and so, if it's high, if it's up seven, eight, nine or ten, then I'm going to do things to soothe so I'm, going to encourage that student to do things that soothe themselves quickly. Breathing is a number one thing um touching if you're, anxious and fearful, maybe touching two different textures things that help bring your heart rate down and soothe you immediately.

J

If you're in the mid-range of like four five or six on that scale, then I am encouraging people to do things that help them communicate or help them feel connected.

J

So that might be when you text your best friend and say today stinks you know, and you just feel that sense of connection and you're communicating how you're feeling or communicating what's going on with you, the down in the lower range, when you just know that that emotion is just kind of there in the background and not letting up. That's when I go into making plans making plans for how can I help myself, who do I reach out to who do I know that could um could help me. What are my resources.

K

C

F

um I had some information I wanted to tell you real, quick that is not actually in the slides, but I just want to tell you that when you have inside your depression as a teenager, actually as a or a teenager, but either way that they can be caused by um a lot of different things. um The school environment is a high pressure situation and peers.

F

um There's the pressure to be long to a click to not belong to a click, to achieve there's pressure from all sides, and sometimes people really pressure themselves pressure themselves to be perfect all the time, which is actually not something that anyone can achieve, but can cause a lot of distress when mistakes happen.

F

There's also the if you have any um difficulties with focusing you have you know ADHD or if you have problems seeing the board or if you have um anything that makes you feel different from other people, then sometimes that causes a feeling of not really being like other people which can cause feelings of anxiety and depression or depression. I should say, and there's um just we talked about social anxiety, and sometimes you know it can just be something environmental, and by that I mean something happened in your life.

F

You lost a loved one, a like a grandparent. You broke up with a a significant other, or even um you know things changed within your peer group. Sometimes people, your friends, turn out to not be your friends um and then you feel just as loneliness. You feel sad. You feel like out of sort sometimes so those are kind of things to look at. Sometimes when you don't really know exactly why this is feeling is, and you, if you're feeling this inside you.

I

I just want to say something real, quick, your endiosyncrasies are what make you you and so anytime. You try to become like someone else, you're taking away who you are, and so whoever is your real friend and we find that out in life. Whoever is your real friend is going to appreciate you for what you have to offer that's different from anybody else that they've ever made, so you don't have to come and be like anyone else uh to to be valuable, because your value is in your uniqueness.

K

Normal to not feel happy all the time.

D

J

H

You're happy all the time. That's not normal.

H

All right, so what I wanted you? That was a perfect last question because it says um emotions come in waves. We can't control what happens to us, but we can control how we respond. So emotions, you're, gonna be high one day you know up and down, and it depends on the situation. So you know you walk into class. You thought you had a test. You were anxious, then you find out there's no test and now you ah you're able to breathe and you're able to relax. That's like two different emotions.

H

So we want you to know that emotions all emotions are good because God gave us all those emotions, and so the key is to be able to regulate those emotions. So you want to be able to go from sad to the next day. You want to be able to use some some. um You know some interventions or some strategies to to help us so emotions matter, and the first thing that we did today was I. Wanted you to feel your feelings.

H

So it's okay to feel and to know you know, I'm, happy, I'm, sad, I'm, angry I'm, scared, I'm, worried. We have all these feelings, and sometimes, if you um there's always extremes like we spoke about with the depression, if it lasts, you know more than a week or it's going on to the next week. You know it's time to reach out and get some help, but if you're just sad because you know you- you feel your math test or something happened, there are some things that you can do to navigate these feelings.

H

So we're going to look at a couple of these. um If it's something you think you can use, take a picture and uh save it and you can probably use it. So here are some things that you can do because remember, emotions are like waves, they come and they go and we want to learn how to respond to them.

H

So we start with the easy one which is happy and so every now and then we feel happy, um so you can share um share it with your loved ones. Whatever made you happy share it, um you can write it down and then don't forget to celebrate so whatever made you happy, remember, you're unique. So whatever makes you happy, may not make someone else happy, but if it does, you want to celebrate you uh because a wave is coming right. A different emotion is about to hit.

H

There comes sadness, and so, when you feel sad here are some things that you can do you can hug someone you love, spend time doing something you like or talk to someone remember. All these emotions are gonna come, so the key is for you to know ahead of time what you're going to do when that emotion comes. So if you know you're going to have negative thoughts in the day going going forward, have your affirmation ready, write it in your book so that you can remember you know?

H

Okay, you know anxiety is Gonna Come throughout the day, but I'm gonna, remember what I'm going to say. Sadness is going to come. So have that person who you know you can depend on whether it's they don't have to be a friend. It could be a mom um or someone and spend time doing something that you like. So you need to know ahead of time. You know what do I like to do. Color um just hang out notice, we didn't show you a phone so something besides clicking on the phone.

H

Okay, all right and um Here, Comes anger, and so when you feel angry here are some things that you can do um so. A deep breath is good because you, uh this is your frontal lobe and when you're, anxious or you're afraid, your and your frontal lobe no longer thinks you're in fight of flight mode. So taking a deep breath, help you to get energy ex um oxygen to your brain and it helps you to think better.

H

So that's why taking a deep breath is so important when you're angry um so practice taking a deep breath, um you can drink some water or go for a walk. So I want to ask you quickly what something else you can do that works for you um when you feel angry one of you in the in the crowd. What is something that you can do when you feel angry and you think it helps you calm down, because another student might think it works for them. So you're right here in the glasses in the black shirt.

H

What's something that you do when you feel angry, listen to music, so that's a good one, so he would have his music queued and ready. If he's going into a situation where he think okay I know this person is about to annoy me. Let me have my music ready, so I can do my deep breaths and listen to my you know to my favorite artist. Anyone else have something else. Yes, you do art yeah nice, so she can draw, don't break the crayon all right! All right! You thank you.

H

Okay, so she will pray and and that's some you can breathe and pray right, so she's going, she can pray and that's a good one, and sometimes when you want to journal, you can journal to God. That's always an option because he keeps your secrets whatever you don't want. He's not gonna tell anybody and unless you know he wants them to know somehow, but all right, and so those are some great ones.

H

Thanks for sharing guys um that you can do and you need to know ahead of time before the feelings come right, I see her shaking her head, she's agreeing she has hers, locked and loaded as well all right. uh So what about when you feel scared, let's think about some things um and have and write them down um and be ready, so tell your parents or your loved ones, is something you can do uh write down your thoughts about why you feel scared.

H

I know I used to be afraid of dogs, because I got mauled twice when I was little uh before five I think I got more two separate times two separate dogs, and so I was afraid of dogs, um and then I went through something like this and they was like. Well, what can you do and I said you know what I can do. This was like a about maybe two years ago I said I can get a dog and that's going to help me get over my fear of dogs.

H

So we got a rescue dog and um now I'm, not afraid of dogs anymore, all right so um to come up with something about. You know. If you know already you're afraid of something you can try to have someone brainstorm with you and then you can have a way to work through that, and it can be you afraid of a test or you're afraid of a subject whatever it is. um The last one says: do stretching and Shake It Off. Does that work for anyone?

H

Oh she said it works for her I know, I, don't think that worked for me, but everyone has theirs, so you got to find which one works for you. So try different ones um when you feel scared and that's what you want to try to do all right and now there's worried so as it I think SATs just passed right, and so some of you may have a few in 11th grade.

H

um You may have been anxious or worried it's another word for worried is anxious and we had a great explanation about what anxiety looks like. So we have to recognize how it feels. um So when you feel worried, take a deep breath here goes the breath again uh believe in yourself um right.

H

There is where you can also say a prayer in the mirror, or you can say an affirmation and then, um most importantly, if anything is going on for a while, and you need support, be sure you reach out, and you talk to someone and that's the key thing we want you to take away today is you're. Not in this alone, we all have emotions and we want you to learn how to uh we call it regulate to self-regulate.

H

So one day you may be feeling sad, you need to regulate and be able to have yourself go from sad to at least um you know, anxious, which is like yellow I wish. I brought the wheel, but we have like the color wheel, so you want to just see yourself driving through or surfing through life and being able to manage how, because the wave is going to come and you have no control over over it.

H

But you can control how you maneuver, through with your emotions, so that they don't overwhelm you or you don't feel like you're drowning, so be sure that you talk with someone and I believe. That's it. So hopefully um at least for this part, oh there's one more scared, I thought we did that already. Oh I went back sorry, guys yeah all right, so some ways may be stronger, but always remember they will all pass. So don't do something permanent for a temporary situation. It will all pass and you look back at it and say wow.

H

You know that was a rough season of my life, but I made it through, and prevention.

J

So when we're talking about prevention, we are talking about things that you do for yourself, your personal care things that that you do to take care of yourself and that usually involves your physical health as well as your emotional health, and so that's written on there with the personal care- and you know like I know, you can read that thing about decreasing your exposure to social media.

J

um You know, and you can handle that there's there's a lot of the the get outside look up, see what the the sky looks like um and and then with prevention, sometimes I, don't think of um typically mental health Counseling in teenagers, um lots of times teenagers, don't think of a mental health counselor as someone that helps them with preventing um problems. But that is a use for that. So they do give you tools to help. You move forward.

J

And so I really wanted to touch base with you all about how parents can help you um or other supportive adults, and one of the things that I've been working with since I was a youth Minister about 30 years ago um is working with an organization called the search. Institute and the search Institute has been doing research on teenagers and they call it.

J

The 40 developmental assets and parents can be heavily involved with this, and so the research that's been going on now for about 60 years shows that more than 5 million young people have consistently shown that these assets that they have these 48. This developmental asset list that you can get a copy of it on the QR code, shows that when young people have these assets, when they have these things like they have supportive adults in their lives when they are engaged academically and when they're engaged in community activities.

J

When they're doing things like the Apopka youth, Council and engaged in that these are the students that are shown to do better in school, to be civically engaged and to Value diversity um and they're, also less likely to have problems with violence, drug use, alcohol use and um sexual activity.

J

So those are usually things that we want to encourage with young people, and we want our parents and other adults, other adults in young people's lives to support, and so how do we do that?

J

um And how do parents actually help support and one of the things that parents can be helping to do as well as teachers and other community leaders is to show young people that they matter um and engage and actually have a conversation with them, not just how a school today, but what are some of the things that give you energy and excitement things that you love?

J

Okay, those are the Sparks um but developmental relationships that are really healthy, also challenge the growth okay, commissioner, just walked in here and was offering scholarship applications to some of you. That's challenging your growth to make it so that you go further than where you are right. Now, um that's a developmental relationship, a healthy one or somebody that challenges your growth, the instructor at school. That gives you a hard time about. You know phoning in that assignment that you just did and got it turned in at 11 59.

J

You know, um and you knew it wasn't really very good and that's the instructor that challenges you on that um healthy developmental relationships also provide support. They help you with completing tasks rather than criticizing you for how you've done it.

J

They also share the power with you. Olivia is sitting up here. Okay, the power has been shared with her.

J

um Right um and you know, sharing power with a teenager means that you're treating them with respect, okay and you're, giving them a say in what happens? Okay, a teenager might not be able to have ultimate say in what they do, but um those developmental relationships are ones where they accept the teenager's input.

J

Power can start to be shared with young people, even when they're as young as like two and three years old with what do you want to wear to school today? You know and and allowing you know, as long as you don't have to have a be. You know: okay, it's a uniform yeah, but you can start sharing power with young people when they're, actually very young, you don't have to wait until they're, 13 and older.

J

um These healthy developmental relationships also expand possibilities and make it so that you're inspired. You know this video that you all put together.

J

That's an inspirational video you've, just expanded the possibilities of others in the community, and anyone who watches that video and you just by showing it today expanded the reach of that video um by sharing it with others that you don't even know.

J

So. That's really really powerful, and so this interview is just a tool, so this QR code takes you to the 4S's interview and the four s's are ask a young person that you know what are their Sparks. What are the things that energize them? What are they excited about? What are their strengths?

J

What are the things that um help them know that they're capable and then what are their struggles struggles is put down as third for a reason, because if you're engaging with a young person, you're not going to immediately go off right off the bat with something that's hard for them to talk about, but if they're feeling comfortable with you and they're talking about the things that bring them energy and the the strengths that they have then they're more likely to share with you their struggles and then wrapping it up with who are their supports?

J

What are their supports and are there supports things that they can access.

D

J

No okay and so I did also want to um I know that others might also want to address this issue of teen suicide, because that is something that is.

J

um You know we're experiencing within our community right now and you all may know someone or know of someone or know of a friend that has lost a friend at their school.

L

J

So this QR code takes you to some of the statistics um that have been collected, unfortunately about teen suicide since 2020., um and one of the things that you can do as teenagers is. If you hear a friend of yours that is um indicating that they're feeling hopeless that they don't have anything to live for like what Courtney was talking about, don't be afraid to bring it up, don't be afraid to say, are you thinking about hurting yourself?

J

um Do you want you know? Are you thinking about? Maybe killing yourself don't be afraid to bring that up um on our table out. There uh is a cheat sheet is what we call it um for. You know, because lots of people get anxious if they hear that somebody that they love and care about is feeling suicidal, um and so the cheat sheet is just This. Acronym is path warm um and the I, and the word is stands for ideation ideation means do they have the idea you know is that their idea in their head?

J

Are they thinking it? um Is it an actual threat, um or is it just a hopeless kind of thought? The S and is um path form stands for substance abuse. Are they you know vaping marijuana cartridges? Are they um drinking alcohol and sneaking you know vodka and stuff like that? You know into their water bottles. You know all of these things. What are they doing?

J

um The P for empath stands for purposelessness, you know, do they have a purpose or do they feel like there's no purpose in their life? Do they have no reason for a living?

J

um Are they dealing with anxiety? It's the a. Are they feeling trapped like they can't get out of this situation, there's nothing that they can do. Are they feeling hopeless.

J

um That's the path part um warm is: is there withdrawal? Are they giving away possessions yeah? um Are they dumping out things that um the two of you have shared? You know necklaces that you made together when you were at summer camp? Are they dumping all of those at your house and saying they don't need them anymore?

J

um That's part of that withdrawal. Is there anger? You know that they can't seem to regulate like what Janice was talking about. Is there some recklessness? Is there risk taking because they don't care, especially if they're driving you know? Are you seeing risk-taking behaviors with your friends when they're behind the wheel?

J

um Are there mood changes? You know? Are they sad more days than not and things like that? Definitely ask the question and you want to assess you know if they have. If your friend has um the idea and they have a plan and they have the means to carry out that plan, do not leave them, but do call for help, but do not leave them stay present with them.

J

That's my soapbox.

C

J

um So, connecting with your team, you know is, is one of those things we do have handouts and the information is on that.

K

Another question: what is the difference between Stress and Anxiety.

J

We go with that.

F

Stress is well the body, uh as a response to stress stress is a change in your environment. Stress can be, as mentioned earlier. um You know if you're going to have a baby and you're pregnant and you um but you're really happy to be having a baby, I'm sure going to have stress because well there's a lot of changes in your body and there's a lot of planning uh the wedding you know, planning a wedding. Stressful dealing with in-laws um might be stressful for some people there's also there's.

F

Basically it's a change that um that affects you from a physiological and and mental point of view that can be either seen as positive or negative, but it still causes um that that um that reaction. So when you are under stress, let's say you work somewhere that you know you work a lot of hours. You have a lot of responsibilities. The boss is kind of difficult um you.

F

You may not be anxious, but you could be stressed out, and you and you handle stress in in ways like where's, like self-soothing exercise, can really help with stress because it releases a lot of that. um That uh angst um anxiety is more like a long worrying uh a lot of times. It's worrying or it's fear, um and it's in response. It is often in response to things that have not yet happened or may not ever happen.

F

uh If you're thinking about the future, you are worrying about things that have not come to pass and may never happen. So you know what I call it the what ifs you know what, if my house burns down? What, if you know my uh you know what, if my father gets sick or what, if you know a lot of things and often a lot of times, there are things that have a low probability of happen, but whether it does or not it's it's. You know. So what?

F

If you know um what, if your father gets sick, uh your father, you would probably he would probably call the doctor. He would probably get medications. um You know, take care of himself, but people stop at what, if and just worry in circles about why? What, if this happens, so stress, is uh feeling a little bit over feeling um physiological reaction to a lot of things going on at one time.

F

A lot of changes that you can reduce by taking care of yourself anxiety is more a little bit more of a problem because it can impair your functioning. If you have anxiety about your being in school, you might not go to school and then it causes problems. You can't graduate if you worry about the future too much you might not, you know, go out of the house or you might not do things like we said before. So really the anxiety is more problematic.

F

You can get out of it by deep breathing and, like you was mentioned, like the affirmations that were mentioned, you know telling yourself that you don't need to worry about this. I, don't need to be afraid of this. This is I'm just going to do this. That I want to do, um and if you can't do that on your own, sometimes you might need help.

L

K

It sounds like stress, anxiety are different, but I hear that there's a lot of it like within High School. Definitely so it's important to know that there are ways to deal with that.

B

Olivia at this time, I would like to um address the audience.

A

If you have a question that you would like for us to like to come up to the podium and.

B

Ask you're more than welcome to and we'll kind of, flip back and forth. Okay is there anyone that would like to come up and ask a question to.

A

L

Good evening, good.

G

L

So my question is that you probably heard of the word escapism used before through media and how some people use it to get away from maybe traumatic events or stressful situations in your life. Do you think escapism could be used as a positive or it could be used as a negative foreign.

I

Degrees, everything is degrees, am I going to use it to get away from it for a moment or am I going to do it to not deal with it. So everything is degrees, so sometimes hey. If that show escape to not go down a negative pathway, then for sure take that. But we have to be careful how long we escape the thing, because at some point in time, depending on what it is, we're going to have to deal with it, and so we can.

I

We don't have to deal with it ourselves, but we're going to have to deal with it. So it's degrees.

L

H

Give her a hand that was Brave.

K

C

K

um Well, we'll we'll come back to the podium.

K

Don't worry, we'll come back, so another question submitted um how do I cope with grief.

I

I'm gonna jump on this one as well.

I

um When dealing with grief first thing: we have to understand that everybody Grieves differently and grief I, don't want to sound overly heavy, but grief is a lifelong process because when you lose someone you're close to that, you love you're, going to have the memory of that person in your mind for the rest of your life. So it's a lifelong process.

I

Now the acuteness isn't as severe as time goes along, usually usually, but it can be kind of like almost like fatimic pain, because your mind remembers pain, easier than your body does, and so, when you think about that law, sometimes you can go just as deep into that loss that you had years ago as when you first felt it and sometimes even worse, and that's just the truth of it. So knowing those things is okay, how do I? How do I deal with that when I'm feeling that way, I need to be around loved ones?

I

I need to be around folks that that really love me that can pour into me uh whether it be positivity whether it be prayer, whether it be you know, just an Embrace and really understanding that this is something that I'm going to is going to come up.

I

um I think a bad language for it is getting over. It I think that's a really bad thing to a wrong way to go about it. It's not about getting over it. It's about learning to live with it, learning how to manage it, I'm going to feel that loss from time to time, I've I've lost young people in my life, I've lost older people in my life and depending on those. uh Those uh relationships is how you're going to feel it and what time it feels around when it comes around a certain holiday.

I

When it comes around this, when it comes around their birthday, when it comes around an anniversary that you two had together, all those things are going to bring it up, sometimes just being in the company of other people. That know them like I'll. Remember when so-and-so used to do this and that can take you there too, so it's a being aware of that everybody's going to deal with it differently and learning I'm, really big on learning how you learn so learning how you deal with it.

I

Okay, now, if I deal with it through, like the young lady, said uh a bit of escape to escapism okay, because I don't want to dwell on it, you know an elongated period of time, I'm not trying to be in denial, but I don't want to dwell on it overly long. So let me escape this for a little while, uh so it doesn't bring me down.

I

So, let's learning how to live with I can go into a couple more scenarios but give um the others uh spaces talk, but it's learning how to really learning how to deal with that and saying: okay, I'm feeling this and don't think that and again I don't want to sound overly heavy. That is going to go away. That's that's not! What's going to happen, it may not be as a cute again, but it's like okay I feel that this comes up when this date comes around as time comes around.

I

It makes me think of this person. Grief is the cost that we pay for love. You know it's like I know that I, when I feel that that just assures me that I love that person so I can also counter my grief by knowing that hey I feel this way, because I love them.

K

Thank you. That was very well spoken.

K

You did you want to ask your question at the podium.

M

So this is kind of out of what you are talking about right now, but I want to say: can the average person be a psychopath? And if so, what are some signs? That someone is a psychopath.

D

That's one of you guys said.

J

Yeah, what are some signs that someone is a psychopath?

J

J

um Okay, so someone being a psychopath, um what I'm, usually looking for if I'm concerned about that is I, am looking for problems in their life that are signs that they had problems with attachment, which means that they didn't have someone in their early stages of development um like in birth, to about age, three, um that that person did not have someone that loved and nurtured them.

J

Okay, um and so that is the first sign that I look for um psychopath is one of the terms that's getting thrown around these days, like back in the 1970s. Somebody would have said: they're, crazy. Okay, now people say: oh, you know he's a psychopath or she's a psychopath, um and it doesn't. The the diagnostic criteria doesn't necessarily mean the same thing that um that we use I, think the term is colloquially.

J

You know, I can't say that word, but in our common everyday language, but someone who truly is a psychopath, um has no sense of connection or attachment to other people, and so therefore, there's no empathy um for others, um and it's not accounted for um by other cognitive and other mental health and societal situations.

J

um Just because somebody struggles with empathy doesn't mean that they're automatically a psychopath, so that's a little bit about how I would be looking for that.

K

Thank you, Jane did you have a question.

B

Hello, everyone. How are you um I spoke to Dr Jackson? It's not really a question. It's really um my journey with mental health, thus far and just I guess like encouragement for anyone else. Who's like you know, struggling because I know sometimes like it feels like almost like a disconnect. Sometimes when you hear advice from people that are older than you, because it's almost like. Oh you, don't understand what I'm going through right now but like I promise like we all go through things, so um I didn't think that I'd be up here.

B

Speaking today, um I lost my cousin a week ago to gun violence, so um we've kind of I've had like a week but um kind of wanted I guess to share with everyone um the fastest way. I can possibly do so.

B

um I think the best place to start is kind of where I grew up. um I Grew From, two immigrant parents, that came from Haiti I'm, first generation, Haitian American and my parents did everything they they could for me. um My mom would go hungry, so I could have a plate to eat. My dad would sleep on the floor, so I could have a pillow.

B

My parents would collect change in bathrooms to so we could have something to eat, but yet I still was embarrassed about this and I'd go to school every day and I'd lie about my situation and I'd tell everyone that I lived in a house that looked like it belonged to Nelly in 2001 and I had everything that I needed, but it wasn't true.

B

um I kept up this Persona I, guess and I found things along the way that kind of made my fake reality kind of feel real I put myself on the title of student athlete and I. Think I was the best at what I did. In my opinion, um I worked very hard for eight years.

B

I had the offers I was where I wanted to be I had a 4.9 GPA in my freshman year, um I was exactly in the position and I thought that gave me value as a person and then um I tore my ACL, my PCL, my LCL, and both of my meniscuses, um my sophomore year and I, couldn't get out of bed and I, couldn't open the laptop when school's, online and I couldn't do anything. But you know I'd been lying this far, so what what was it to keep lying?

B

You know like I was like okay, like I'm at home. It's easier now, like hey everybody, I'm going to practice and I'm sitting in bed, so um that was happening and as I kept lying about my situation and as I kept believing that I was this strong person, things just started getting worse and worse and worse and worse, because you periodically go down. It's not like a day that you just go down.

B

It's very periodic, so um some ways that I continue and I have gotten better was just understanding that motivation isn't something that comes from just you. Living motivation comes from motives. That's the first part of the word. But what happens when life seems like it has none. You know that's! When discipline comes in play, that's when you have to ask your friends and your family for support. That's when you make calendars, that's when you like try to have people to rely on and shoulders to cry on.

B

um Another thing was letting go of the tangible things: you're, not the things that you do, I promise or not um my ninth grade year, if you asked me who Jade was I'd, probably start reciting off my resume to you, but um it's completely different. Now so I mean you have to understand that you're. So much more than just these things that you do um I understand that life we put a lot of pressure on us being student athletes us having good grades, but those are not the things you do.

B

I'm proud of everyone, if you have those accomplishments, but that's not you you're, so much more than that, um and the last thing, I'd want to say, is to just understand: stop category categorizing yourself with these negative words. um My whole life I was told that I'm, a very messy person and I started to believe that. But you have to understand that sometimes Society just doesn't have the resources for you available.

B

So if you are Messier, if you do struggle with anger, that does not mean you're an angry person that does not mean you're a messy person. That does not mean you're a wrong person. It just means that you need a little bit more support, so just ask for the support.

B

um I kind of try to describe myself sometimes is wanting to be like wind. um One of my favorite scriptures in the Bible describes people that are born of the spirit-like wind. You don't know where you're going, you don't know your destination, but you know that you're moving, um that's how everyone and that's how I I really do aspire to be just move just allow yourself to live your your story is already written in a big book somewhere.

B

It's just here for you to live things are not here for you to understand it's for you to learn. And lastly, um your purpose I know that there's this big I guess thing about purpose and all this and everyone wants to know their purpose and the truth is like your purpose. Isn't there for you to understand either your purpose for today might have been to walk past somebody in a gray shirt like oh, my gosh gray reminds me of happiness. That was your purpose.

B

For that time, it doesn't necessarily mean that you have to have the next 50 years. Figured out for yourself, you know um and yeah I'm, oh I'm, sorry y'all, but um another thing is like as teenagers I know that we look at our phone a lot and this whole self-healing journey thing is really popular right now and I just want you guys to let you know that um going to brunch twice. If you go home and you don't feel better, that's you're, not crazy. It doesn't really make you feel better um self-healing.

B

It may, but self-healing self learning yourself is going to come with a lot of Tears, because you're gonna find those moments of yourself. You're gonna find those positions you're going to find that that side of you that you try to hide for so long. Those mistakes you've made they're going to come back to life. So I just want you to.

B

Let you guys know that, like self-healing, it will hurt sometimes but I promise you after you get past that hurt, and you use these resources that everyone here is kind of telling you it's gonna get better, so um yeah I hope everyone has a great day and you guys um yeah.

K

Thank you for sharing Jade.

A

Is there anyone else that would like to say anything or have any other questions for the panel all right, so we're going to answer one more question: okay,.

K

Question do I have bipolar disorder just because my mood changes.

J

J

You know Dr Janice was talking about you know our moods and our emotions come in waves and sometimes our moods, take extreme shifts and bipolar illness is defined by extreme chefs, and just because you have extreme mood, changes does not mean you have bipolar illness again, just like a psychopath um bipolar illness for an official diagnosis, there's criteria that needs to be met, and it's not just being moody and.

H

It's usually genetics, usually.

J

There are some genetics at play and and Things That Go.

A

Panel I'm going to give you all an.

B

Opportunity to say any.

A

Other parting words or words of encouragement and then we'll we'll wrap up our night.

I

um I, just have a few things I just want. You know, for you know us to hold on to that. uh One of the great principles that I live by is awareness is our power to make an informed decision, and so once you become aware of what your triggers are, what makes you happy? What makes you sad? That's now I'm informed to counteract whatever is happening. You see what I'm saying so I have that I have to know those things and recognize those things. Another thing is with all the guidance that's been given today.

I

Is that um whatever guidance that we find um that works for us and it's good for us, we can't just let it become guidance. We have to let it become governance, and so it can't be just to think I'm Guided by it has to be something that begins to rule my life, because what happens with the ways that Genesis talked about is this? Is that okay I know these waves are coming and I have something to counteract that now, I can't just be thinking about it. I have to move that way.

I

So when the thing when the negativity comes, if I know, somebody's negative around me, I have to start questioning my relationship with this person, even if they're family I'm not going to stop loving them, but I need to learn. Sometimes we have to learn how to love from a distance, and so I was like I love you but being around. You is not good for me and it's okay to know. What's not good, for you all right and to speak up as well. So another thing is openness, a common opportunities, if you're not open about.

I

What's going on with you, you're actually listening the opportunity for you to get help from the many people that around you they're all loving you, because the one thing that happened with people that um so I'm thinking about taking their lives, they don't they think it's going to be easier for everybody else when they're not around. So it's actually a lot of people think that suicide is selfish and it's really not a lot of times. It's really not I know it doesn't sound crazy. It's really not a person's actually thinking.

I

They think that they're thinking of other people and I'm, not I'm, not a medical, professional but they're shaking their head yeah, so I'm, not I'm, not off okay, you're on target I just want to make sure that I'm in my Lane, but uh you know when, when it's people that they think that they're taking care of other people, and so we have to make sure that those people that show us those signs of those signals- yes speak up, and this is the one thing I say: that's the secret!

I

You don't keep if you know somebody's thinking about that. That is not the secret you keep. That is not the thing that you keep to yourself and you don't tell put because you might not know how to help that person other than to love them. But you got to reach out to your counselors.

I

You got to reach out to your teachers, somebody that can actually get this person help so that they don't follow through with that, because the world's going to be a dimmer place without them, even though they don't see their own value, even though they think it's going to be better without them. So that's a thing, um two more things and I'll be out y'all here, but um comparison is divisive and so anytime we start thinking about comparing myself against the next person I'm.

I

You know, I mentioned she mentioned being a student athlete I'm trying to compare myself with them. You have an entirely different skill set. You have an entirely different background. You have an entirely different motor. There are a lot of people who are less skilled but have more heart and that's what got them into the position that they also comparison is divisive and it's going to devalue somebody and a lot of times it devalues us last thing. Is your competition? Is your yesterday?

I

That's your competition you're not competing against your classmates you're, not competing against Society you're competing against your yesterday. What did I do yesterday that I can do better today if I had a bad day yesterday, I bet you I could have a better day today. I bet you I can have a better day than I had last week. I had a bad week, but I bet you this week's gonna be a better week and you start competing against what happened. What happened in your life?

I

What can you do to better yourself, and so these are some things that I just want to kind of um put out there that'll, hopefully um helpful so.

F

um I'd like to say something say that that um well really for anyone, but I, know that high school and middle school are really a challenge and struggle, and even if you're, not in in those schools and in any parts of life, can be a struggle and often it it's just too painful. um It feels to you that it's just too painful what you're trying to go through and that that you can't see a way out and that the solution is is to to end your life, because you don't see an end to the pain.

F

That is the reason why people consider suicide because they don't see how they can get out of pain and chronic pain. Physical chronic pain is is, is just pretty hard to manage too, but this is the kind of pain. That's even worse than that, and so my message is really that, while it may seem as if you can't get out of it, that you can- and you will I mean these things are temporary I mean they're kind of long, but they're temporary Middle School is is a couple of years.

F

High School is four years and then all the life stressors after that you can overcome the barrier. You can overcome the emotional anguish you can reach out for help and then you, you might someday, look back on it and think wow I'm really glad I didn't take my life, then because look what I've had what blessings I've had since then. So that is what I want to leave you with.

B

And one thing that I also wanted to just make sure that we remind you know what there's many parents that are here today: parents, if you are struggling, if you know that you need help I want you to make sure that you are aware of the impact that it's having on your children.

B

I can recall as a child. My mother went through depression and the impact that it had on me. So I'm hoping for you all. If you are dealing with issues that you also are seeking the help.

B

Thank you all so much for coming tonight. I appreciate all of you I'm, hoping that this has blessed you all. You know we thought that we would pack the room, but everyone that was supposed to be here is here and I. Thank God for that um all the panelists are they've supplied us with all types of pamphlets and information on how we can um get in touch with them. Please stop by their tables and um thank them for coming to visit with us tonight and volunteering their time.

B

Please know that I I truly appreciate all of you. I have gifts for you, so don't don't run off before you see me, um but thank you all so much for coming and I appreciate it. Thank you. Thank you.

B

And get your picture taken outside make sure you guys take pictures with those balloons. Okay,.

D